recently
ugh. low body temperature.it's like, 36.3 degrees....
blehh. exams almost over, but don't really feel mu...
brr.i need brain maintenance.copied all the chines...
haa.. today was fun, in a crazy, wrong sort of way...
haha... today was wierdness. maybe as wierd as yes...
haha... realized that when i just sit and type, i ...
okae... now i'm back... sorry about the last time....
return to the scene.
tonite i was just sitting around thinking in betwe...
bleah.just had a haircut. ick. stupid EChouse. aha...
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Monday, May 09, 2005
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this period is irritating. exams over, but then still cannot slack, cause for one thing, there's still school, and for another thing, there's a load of overdue stuff to do and hand in.. seriously not in the mood to do it.. just want to drop *plonk* and slack..
feeling really useless.. hahaa.. so.. halfway there. yea, getting there, better than before, but so sickening~ i know i'm getting better, but at this rate i'll be an old man before i get there, lol.
baritone, neither bass nor tenor.. sure, can have the greatest range, but still.. neither here nor there, excelling in neither field.. blehh.
top sch, bottom of the form.. what's the use. it makes ppl think things, both inside and outside of sch.. in the end it can't be pretty.
so many opportunities, just so many screw-ups. i'm not born to lead. not the way people expect us to. leaders aren't meant to lead... not in my world. how can one person having a final say in everything make sense.. in the end, the decision affects everyone. somehow, even if it means some people making compromises, everyone has to be in agreement..
i've decided i really like forums. way better than chatrooms. one person talking at a time, sometimes it's even better than real life. seriously... some people will just babble on and on about something unimportant or just simply minor.. when there are bigger things to consider, to worry about. well.. in that sense a smaller group of people does help. somehow in a smaller group, whenever someone talks it's more personal, it's more like someone talking to someone else. so people listen. haa..
giving up. humans are such... undescribible beings. "fact of the day: research shows that the words chosen in any conversation only represent 7% of the meaning which the speaker/writer is trying to show. the tone, facial and bodily expression, most notably the expression in the party's eyes shows the remaining meaning of the messege to be conveyed."
maybe that's why it's so easy to talk online, through forums or msn or chatrooms.. we can hide behind our own words, speak with such.. vagueness, if there is even such a word. when it comes to real life it's suddenly all exposed, i just gotta hide somewhere.
lol... not really. people are just people in the end. just have to get used to it, i guess... but other people can't. haiz.. lol. starting to feel *like that* again. really don't have a real place anywhere... moving around the place all the time. haa.. hm. just noticed, actually.. the only people i've really actually been with is 6K... and now, it seems that perhaps not really..
some south korean guy sent me a messenge on friendster to go for some politics/entertainment convention/presentation thing, as far as i could make out.. lol his english was good. ah.. too bad i'm not really in south korea. or am i.. hahhahaaa~ madness
suddenly can't imagine growing up with someone else by my side. maybe tt's why it's impossible.. lol. i'm not meant to settle down, i have to keep moving around.. sometimes things i actually want to do and am forced to do get so mixed up, i can't remember which is which.. lol. sounds stupid. but in the end, the feelings just get all mixed up, then random things will occur... stupid stuff so often.
ah well. i'll always have the Lord. and He will have me, no doubt.
have the omens left me? have i been forsaking them?
have they even ever been with me?
are there even omens?
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9:54 pm
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